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Pillsbury Doughboy funeral
Please join me in remembering a great icon.
The Pillsbury Doughboy died
yesterday of a yeast infection and complications from repeated pokes in the
belly. He was 71.
Doughboy was buried in a lightly greased coffin.
of celebrities turned out to pay their respects, including Mrs.
Buttersworth, Hungry Jack, the California Raisins, Betty Crocker, the
Hostess Twinkies, and Captain Crunch.
The gravesite was piled high with
flours. As long-time friend, Aunt Jemima, delivered the eulogy, describing
Doughboy as a man who never knew how much he was kneaded.
quickly in show business, but his later life was filled with turnovers. He
was not considered a very "smart" cookie, wasting much of his dough on
Despite being a little flaky at times, even still, he
was a crusty old man and was considered a roll model for millions.
the end it was thought he would rise again, but alas, he was no tart.
Doughboy is survived by his wife, Play Dough; two children, John Dough and
Jane Dough; plus they had one in the oven. His elderly father, Pop Tart,
also survives him.
The funeral was held at 3:50 Ovenbake Street. It lasted
about twenty minutes.