* Energizer Bunny arrested - charged with battery.
* A pessimist's blood type is always b-negative.
* Practice safe eating - always use condiments.
* Shotgun wedding: A case of wife or death.
* I used to work in a blanket factory, but it folded.
* If electricity comes from electrons... does that mean that morality comes from morons?
* Marriage is the mourning after the knot before.
* A hangover is the wrath of grapes.
* Corduroy pillows are making headlines.
* Sea captains don't like crew cuts.
* Does the name Pavlov ring a bell?
* A successful diet is the triumph of mind over platter.
* A gossip is someone with a great sense of rumor.
* Without geometry, life is pointless.
* When you dream in color, it's a pigment of your imagination.
* Reading whilst sunbathing makes you well-red.
* When two egotists meet, it's an I for an I.