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Jobs I've tried

Submitted by John Baker

My first job was working in an orange juice factory, but I got
canned....couldn't concentrate.

Then I worked in the woods as a lumberjack, but I just couldn't hack it,
so they gave me the axe.

After that I tried to be a tailor, but I just wasn't suited for it, mainly
because it was a so-so job.

Next I tried working in a muffler factory but that was too exhausting.

Then I tried to be a chef, figured it would add a little spice to my life,
but I just didn't have the thyme.

I attempted to be a deli worker, but anyway I sliced it, couldn't cut the
mustard.

My best job was being a musician, but eventually I found I wasn't
noteworthy.

I studied a long time to become a doctor, but I didn't have any patience.

Next was a job in a shoe factory; I tried but I just didn't fit in.

I managed to get a good job working for a pool maintenance company, but
the
work was just too draining.

So then I got a job in a workout center, but they said I wasn't fit for
the job.

After many years of trying to find steady work, I finally got a job as an
historian, until I realized there was no future in it.

I became a professional fisherman, but discovered that I couldn't live on
my net income.

My last job was working at Starbucks, but I had to quit because it was
always the same old grind.

SO I RETIRED AND I FOUND I'M PERFECT FOR THE JOB!